Just Jen

I take it back . . .

2009-11-08T15:39:00.001-08:00

apparently Shauna still checks my blog. She must love me.

My Secret, Public Blog

2009-11-08T15:37:00.001-08:00

I think I'll blog a lot whilst I'm home this week . . . and I doubt if anyone will check up on this page -- it's been over a year since my last blog.
Mwah ha ha!

I'm at home . . .

2009-11-08T12:10:00.001-08:00

in Ohio, not Nashville, in striped pajamas, with a purple turbie twist (yes, it's a real thing) on my head. My mom happened to have my blog bookmarked on her old computer, so I followed it. The bookmark, not the computer. It's not as if the computer started beckoning to me with its mouse, while trying to hypnotize me with a swirly, psychedelic screen saver. That would be weird.
Almost as weird as the aforementioned purple turbie twist.

Just because Shauna said so . . .

2008-06-30T07:41:00.001-07:00

And, let's be real here, she scares me.

She is, after all, the Lemonader.

So, when Shauna says "Post," I say "How many words?"

What I learned from watching TV last night . . .

2007-02-08T15:00:00.000-08:00

No matter who says it, or in what context, "See you later, decorator," just isn't cool.

I'm scared . . .

2007-02-08T14:52:00.000-08:00

that Katy and Becca will gang up on me and bully me onto some sort of blog slavery ship, where I'm confined below decks and chained to a computer.
Of course, I'm not sure where they would get ahold of a slavery ship or where we would keep it. Percy Priest lake, maybe? Or, some secret hide-out, like in Goonies?
hmmmm . . .

I'm off!!!

2006-10-11T07:18:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm going to Las Vegas, like this very minute (we're waiting on Robin, who is running late -- all who are surprised?). I just looked through the results of the Ugly Picture Challenge, and I am quite impressed. Can't wait to get back on Sunday . . . so I can come up with clever captions and such.
Viva ugly picture challenge.

Jen's Clever Ugly Picture Challenge

2006-10-08T13:15:00.000-07:00

I hereby challenge you to find the most unflattering picture you have of yourself and post it on your blog.
The rules are:
1. Post an ugly picture of yourself,
2. Don't post ugly pictures of your unsuspecting friends, and
3. Everyone who comments on the Ugly Picture Post must come up with a clever caption that fits your picture.
Here's mine, although I think Becca has an uglier one of me somewhere:
Let the ugliness and cleverness begin!

Ahoy!

2006-10-04T18:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Chris brought home "Marshmallow Mateys." It's basically generic Lucky Charms in a bag, but it's very fun to throw into conversation. "Boy, I could really use some Marshmallow Mateys right now." "Are there any more Marshmallow Mateys left?" "I can't wait to get home and devour a great big bowl of Marshmallow Mateys."

Try it at home. You don't even have to have Marshmallow Mateys on the premises in order to toss the name into casual conversation. Trust me, much hilarity will ensue.

Disclaimer

2006-10-03T19:19:00.000-07:00

The tone-deaf baritone was not Becca, nor was said baritone connected to Becca in any way, shape, or form, nor was said baritone employed by or affiliated with any companies or corporations owned by Becca.

It wasn't Becca.

Barbershop EXTRAVAGANZA

2006-10-01T12:53:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's that time again . . . the men's district barbershop competition in Chattanooga, TN. Once again, I find myself surrounded by men in matching suits, who are standing around in little circles, one ear plugged, singing tags about girls in gingham gowns and the South.

I am forced to admit that this year I actually participated in the tag singing. My "circle" included myself, two rather inebriated girls that I know from my region, and a tone-deaf baritone.

Good times.

What I learned from watching TV this morning . . .

2006-09-28T20:03:00.000-07:00

If you are a vampire slayer, having a boyfriend who is a vampire can make life very complicated.

Gratuitous post

2006-09-27T12:55:00.000-07:00

I'm just posting this picture so I can get it onto my profile. Don't you feel used now?

It's the only bridesmaid's dress I've ever liked. Thanks, Lisa!

I wonder who will be the first to notice . . .

2006-09-27T12:08:00.000-07:00

that I'm blogging again? My guess is Becca.

By the way, if you want to see a 20-year-old picture of me, go to my seester's (yes, that's what we call each other. Seester.) blog. It's truly heinous.

I am completely addicted to this online game at www.playbabble.com. It's for nerds, really. Yet, I can't not play. This has caused some deep-seated neuroses to surface. "Am I a nerd? How long have I been a nerd? Am I the only one who DOESN'T know I'm a nerd?"

But, then, I ponder Last Minute's T-shirts and somehow feel much better about myself. If I am a nerd, at least Last Minute loves me.

By the way, this isn't Last Minute's T-shirt. But, it kind of says it all anyway, doesn't it?

What's in a Name?

2006-01-11T17:46:00.000-08:00

So, Chris and I are really praying about adopting a girl from China. Or, as my friend Robin so delicately puts it, a Chinababy. She says it all in one word, as in, "So, when are you getting your Chinababy?" She has this outrageous country accent, too -- you gotta love her. Everyone who knows her does love her, now that I think about it. You just can't help it.

Anyway, Chris and I were trying to think of names for our future daughter. Our favorite, so far, is "Kung Pao Cooke." I think any child would like to have the word "Pow" in their name.
It's like being a super hero.

Robin and I, intelligently discussing world events.

23rd Post

2005-12-27T20:27:00.000-08:00

The Twenty-Third Post
Here's the game:
1. Search your blog archive.
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Find the fifth sentence (this is meant to say something about you).
4. Post that sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five people to do the same.

Mine is: Tonight, my mom, dad, sister and I sat around the table in my parents' kitchen, played euchre, and laughed until our stomachs hurt.

Yeah, that's good stuff.

Once again, all my people are tagged. DaBANG it!

For those of you who don't know how to play euchre, I will gladly teach you. We will have a Lenny's-eating, green-velvet-shoe-wearing, euchre-playing party.

By the way . . .

2005-12-27T20:14:00.000-08:00

the movie quote in my 22nd post was from "Dumb and Dumber." You know, right after they give that guy the sandwich with the hot sauce and he's writhing on the floor? Pills are good, pills are GOOOOOD.
Good times . . .

Definitely the best medicine.

2005-12-27T17:42:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking a lot about how people deal with grief. It's no secret to most of you that our family has had a rough time this year. Today was especially difficult. However, I am blessed to be part of a family that can pretty much laugh through anything. Tonight, my mom, dad, sister and I sat around the table in my parents' kitchen, played euchre, and laughed until our stomachs hurt.
We question why God has allowed the tragedies He has this year. We may never know the answer until we're all home with Him. But, I will say, that the difficult times do serve to remind me how grateful I am to have the family I have. Even if we don't understand what's going on, God does. That's good enough for me.

The 22nd Post

2005-12-26T19:02:00.000-08:00

This is my 22nd post, so I can't play Becca's game yet. I have to keep it out of my mind when I write my next one, so I don't purposefully write something profound and meaningful for my fifth sentence. Mine will probably be something like "Chocolate is good." Yeah.
If you have no idea what this blog means, click on Becca's link below and read "The Twenty-Third Post." You should be visiting Becca's blog on a regular basis, anyway. Becca is good.
Movie quote challenge: "Pills are good, pills are GOOD." There's a shiny new quarter in it for the first person to correctly identify the movie.

THE QUINTATHALON

2005-12-24T06:41:00.000-08:00

Whenever my sister and I get together at my parents' house, we have our quintathalon (or triathalon or quadrathalon, depending on what my parents have added to their collection). It's very exciting. You see, as soon as my sister and I moved out of the house, my parents decided to get all this cool stuff in their basement. I don't know if this was meant to lure us back home or just to taunt us. So, now they have an awesome air hockey table, pool table, foos ball table, PS2 with DDR, and a talking dart board.
So, of course, Katy and I just have to compete. Each event is won by 2 out of 3 games, so it takes forever. Whoever wins the quintathalon receives the satisfaction of knowing that they won the quintathalon. It's very prestigious.
I will keep you updated after Christmas, because I know you all will be anxiously awaiting the results.
Oh, yeah, my parents also got a hot tub after we left. It's not one of the events, obviously, but where was all this stuff when I was living at home?

This blog has been given a PG rating . . .

2005-12-23T15:11:00.000-08:00

Prepare yourselves . . .

Who in the world at Wal-Mart decided to stack the horses in this inappropriate manner?

Mom and I were very appalled.

Fat, Freaky Snowmen

2005-12-23T11:44:00.000-08:00

Note the absence of dancing.

I hope this doesn't give Becca nightmares.

Sad . . .

2005-12-22T18:34:00.000-08:00

I'm in Ohio, by the way. Today, Mom, Dad, and I worked on decorating the house. We pulled out a miniature white piano upon which two small snowmen are supposed to dance around (it's all magnetized, you know -- no magic involved. Sorry if I just disillusioned anyone out there). Unfortunately, even though the piano played music, the little fat snowmen just sat there, grinning at us. Dad said that if they don't start dancing soon, they're going to Goodwill. They remain unfazed by his threats.

Thought for the day from Chris . . .

2005-12-17T08:32:00.000-08:00

Love makes people weird.

What I learned from watching TV tonight . . .

2005-12-16T19:29:00.000-08:00

With great power comes great responsibility.

ALSO, if you come to school with brand-new super powers, your friends will look at you funny.

Though, personally, I would love to find out my friend has super powers. Then I could fight evil vicariously through my friend and not get hurt or maimed in any way. Unless, of course, the evildoers found out about our friendship. Hmmmm.

I'm sure that Chris has some sort of popcorn-related super power. I'm just not sure how useful it is, yet.

Becca? Dan? Deeds? Meagan? Frank? Jeff? Anyone? Super powers?

Mom? Katy?

Anyone?

Puddle Trouble

2005-12-11T19:44:00.000-08:00

Chris' mom has come to visit us for the day. We really enjoy having her here. She brought Dooley along with her. Dooley is a perfectly pleasant cocker spaniel with one tiny, minor flaw. Any time you acknowledge her in any way, either with a friendly petting or just saying her name, she gets really excited and decides to demonstrate her appreciation by peeing.
The result is that we must completely ignore her, walking around saying "There is no dog," much in the manner of Neo.
There is no dog, there is no dog . . .

Yea. I'm it.

2005-12-11T09:27:00.000-08:00

Seven things I want to do before I die:
Adopt children
Go to Ireland
Write a children's book
Get a shiny hat
Go on a missions trip out of the country
Learn a language
Go sky-diving

Seven things I cannot do:
Flirt
Conciously hurt someone's feelings
Lie to my husband
Climb a rope
Sing bass
Go to sleep with cold feet
Eat onions in any form

Seven things that attract me to my spouse:
He is always striving to be a Godly man
He makes me laugh
He loves me even when I'm drooling on a pillow with no makeup
He accepts my faults but challenges me to work on them
I'm a better person when I'm around him
He's humble
He's my best friend

Seven things I say most often:
Curses!
I love you
Yea
Actually . . .
Bless your/her/his heart
Movie quotes
Cool

Seven books I love (this is difficult):
Bible (James, especially)
The Good Earth
Mansfield Park (and everything else Jane has ever written)
Return of the King
The Hiding Place
Chronicles of Narnia/'Til We Have Faces
The Once and Future King

Seven Movies I Could Watch Over and Over:
2 Weeks Notice
Love, Actually
Without a Clue
Ocean's 11
Waiting for Guffman
Rounders
MST3K -- This Island Earth and The Screaming Skull

Seven people I want to tag
All my people are tagged, already.

Shameful Confession

2005-12-11T09:05:00.000-08:00

I am SO addicted to reality-show television. It's truly sad. This past Thursday night, I found myself switching between "The Apprentice," "Project Runway," and "America's Next Top Model" (rerun), which were inconsiderately being shown during the same time slot.
I find that words like "chopping block," "eliminated," and "alliance," have become regular parts of my speech. How did this happen? Why?
I would say that I might be a good candidate for an intervention, but I could get violent and start throwing remote controls, of which we have many.
Perhaps aversion therapy, in which I am tied to a chair and forced to watch "Laguna Beach" (blech) episodes until I'm cured?

Just in case you thought I was making it up . . .

2005-12-08T19:13:00.000-08:00

What I learned from watching TV tonight . . .

2005-12-07T19:59:00.000-08:00

Do not drink too much beer whilst editing a airline test audience video for which you will have to answer to Martha Stewart. It will get you fired.

I just want my POPCORN!

2005-12-07T19:39:00.000-08:00

Okay, Chris bought a 50 POUND bag of popcorn from Sam's Club the other day. Now, he feels obligated to eat popcorn every day. It kind of reminds me of the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special, when they couldn't make a turkey, so they had popcorn and toast instead. Do you ever watch those specials and wonder where their parents are?

Anyway, you should see the bag -- it looks like we're laying cement or something.

I'm thinking about popping the whole bag, sneaking out to Pedro Garcia's house, and trying to fool him into canceling school for a snow day by scattering the popcorn all over his front yard.

Parlez-vous francais?

2005-12-04T07:13:00.000-08:00

I woke up in the middle of the night, because Chris was talking in his sleep again. The funny thing is, he was speaking French. I promise, I'm not making this up . . .

Escape to (or is it from?) Barbershop . . .

2005-12-03T16:31:00.000-08:00

Well, we went with Becca and Noah to see a men's barbershop show today. Okay, it was fun, and there was definitely the odd, unintended humorous moment. Like, when the fake "fence" flopped over with a loud bang, right in the middle of a rousing rendition of "Oklahoma." Chris' comment: "You can't buy entertainment like that."

What I learned from watching TV tonight . . .

2005-11-30T19:57:00.000-08:00

In fashion, you're either "in," or you're "out."

It's like being the "fifth member" of the Beatles . . .

2005-11-27T05:39:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention . . .

2005-11-26T11:18:00.000-08:00

that in the spirit of Christmas and a general holiday fervor, I decided to decorate Chris' drum set. I think it looks lovely. Chris declines to comment.

Christmas Tree Hijinx

2005-11-26T11:13:00.000-08:00

Well, Chris and I finally got the tree down from the attic and put it up today. Actually, Chris put it up, while I gave very detailed and helpful instructions (I wish I had a megaphone . . .). Here are our before and after pictures. By the way, if you haven't bought a Christmas tree yet, we HIGHLY recommend the pre-lit, Wal-Mart variety. I love pre-lit trees -- really cuts down on the tree-putting-up time, making it very difficult for your spouse to get mad and throw the tree out the window. Of course, if this is your idea of holiday entertainment, stick with the regular, run-of-the-mill, takes-three-hours-to-put-up tree.

What I learned from watching TV tonight . . .

2005-11-25T21:55:00.000-08:00

What to do when surrounded by velociraptors:
1. Don't look them in the eye.
2. Give them back their eggs.
3. Run.
I'm sure this will come in very handy at some point in my life.

It's all about me . . .

2005-11-25T19:58:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving

2005-11-25T18:12:00.000-08:00

You know, I have to admit, I kind of enjoyed having Thanksgiving at home, just me and Chris. It mainly consisted of food, insane TV-watching, and extensive DDR training (mainly me -- Chris is still holding out for Call of Duty 2). I cooked most of the Thanksgiving dinner (insert collective gasp from all of my friends and family), excluding the ham, which Chris did on the Weber outside (surprisingly good).
Chris is working at Starbucks right now, so I'm home alone. Doing laundry and getting ready to call my family -- I know, I'm a wild woman.